Redirect Options for retired hostname using SSL

Is there any way to process traffic on port 443 without performing a certificate exchange, so that the user will send their request in a way that I can redirect them without having to un-encrypt the traffic?

Their is no way to achieve this without a certificate. When the client types https:// the browser is expecting an SSL conversation after the session is established. Anything else will throw an error. You even can't do a redirect until after the SSL has been established as the F5 cannot read the traffic until that happens.

HTTP::respond 301 Location "https://my new page"

Given the above you can trigger a 301 permanent redirect. This means the users browser should cache it and automatically use it the next time the bookmark is used. You may want to check in the new site that customers are coming from the old site page (see Referrer header) and put up a page/or message that the user should update their bookmarks to the new site.