Thanks! I was sure follow what you said and found out something very interesting: I never had RAM Cache fully working. Turns out that before offloading ssl on the VS I didn't properly verify the file (32 meg) was added as an entry. After SSL, I was looking at that so... yeah.
So, after pulling all of my hair out, having F5 support "get back to me" a few times, I found that the only way I could get RAM cache to work was to enable mirroring on the pertinent VS... makes no sense to me and I am guessing this is something that just makes a broken thing work. One of the reasons I feel this is getting this error when and only when I attempt to cache and download a relatively large about from cache:
Limiting open port RST response from 251 to 250 packets/sec
Considering getting 5-10 of these in a row causes "Clock advanced by 102 ticks", I am very concerned.
Oh, and yes, SSL offload + RAM cache is working. Thanks again!